Oh Danny Boy

Busy morning, I was at capacity. The cots were full of kids with aches and kids with scrapes. Some aches real and some not, but all must be triaged and attended. These are the times I rely on my years of nursing experience. My tour of duty as a nurse, extensive - my instincts, honed - my judgment, beyond reproach.

Sarah came in holding her stomach. “Cot four,” I told her “and lie still until the ache goes away” I said sagely.

Isaiah, with a tear in his eye, showed me a scrape on his elbow. “Do you want the Scooby bandaid or the bacon and eggs bandaid?” I asked. Smiling, he selected Scooby and I released him back to class.

Danny, a kindergartener, wandered into the office in the middle of the triage mayhem. Appeared happy, no apparent aches, not bleeding, possible frequent flyer my sharp instincts deduced. “Have a seat over there Danny,” I said as I noticed all the cots were full.

Frowning he looked at the stool and then back at me. “That chair looks too hard,” he said. “Can I sit in that softest chair over there?”

I followed his pointing finger to my desk chair. “Yes that would be fine,” I said. “Just stay out of the desk and don’t play on the computer.” “I’ll be with you in a moment,” I directed him as I turned back to another child coming through the door.

Finally the morning rush subsided. Danny sat happily on my soft padded office chair. His little legs swung back and forth and he twisted this way and that in my chair.

“Well,” I turned to Danny. “You don’t appear to be sick or hurt.”

“No, I not sick.”

“Are you skipping class then?” I asked as I thought for sure he would become a future frequent flyer.

“Nope, that’s a bad thing to do,” he responded with that same happy smile.

“Ok,” I said. “I give up, what’s wrong with you.

“I peed my pants.”

“What, no, I mean, here, get up, I mean, sit, I mean stand,” I blurted with the shock of realization.

Danny hopped off the chair. I took his hand, picked out some dry cloths from my spare cloths pile and ushered him down to the bathroom to change him. On the way back to the office I dropped him off at his classroom and then rushed back to inspect my office chair. Touching and smelling the fabric I confirmed the evidence with disbelief.

School nurse zero, Kindergartener one.